I would challenge that most peoples best memories or any kind of real memory has to do with interacting with other people in a genuine way. I would also challenge that if questioned, "What would you do if you found out you had only one year to live?" Most people would say that they would want to spend it interacting with those they love. So if we know that the only thing worth 'doing' is 'being' with other people in a. real way why do we waste so much time not being with others. I think it might be that in order to genuinely be with another person we must first genuinely face our selves. This might be too scary for a lot of us so we put on a mask in order to be around others with out facing who we truly are. We all know how draining it is to keep a mask on around others. We hit a breaking point and excuse our selves from the group in order to be safe and alone in our own false beliefs about reality. This seems like a very strange cycle we choose to live in. For those of us with deep hurts it is not so strange. But I'm convinced the more we put our selves around others and push through those first few hard times it will get easier. After a while the cycle will transform into a craving to be around people in an honest way. One will start to notice that others reflect who we genuinely are back to ourselves and we do the same for them.
A true danger is being alone to long with our own thoughts. They can turn reality into false perceptions of others and ourselves. What will give us the freedom and strength to step out into the light to see who we are? Please know that true discovery of oneself and others is hard but it is the greatest adventure we will experience.
"I would challenge that most peoples best memories or any kind of real memory has to do with interacting with other people in a genuine way"
ReplyDelete"We all know how draining it is to keep a mask on around others. "
I absolutely agree. Sometimes it frustrates me when people are using their mask on me. Its like the thing we all crave so much, like truly crave, is right there, behind the surface, but you have to "waist time", so to speak, with the... like, automation, the replica. It marginally satisfies social needs, but pales in comparison to that "genuine interaction" that your talking about... I love always to get closer to the person behind the mask. Its an amazing thing to feel safe with someone else, more safe than you feel by yourself, to be exposed past the point you even let yourself see, and be loved for what is there, and in return, find that same thing in another person, to be able to truly love them for who they are behind the mask, either the one they make for themselves, or the one you make for them.
I do think we make masks for other people all the time, we put them on pedestals, or we vilify them, and make them into someone to hate... I see it so often. Its hard to face the pain that lies behind those we dislike, to identify with them, to love them, and not be able to help them, to be pushed away by the mask which is so obvious. It is just as hard to see the flaws in those we want to love, that we are afraid of not loving, or of having conflict with (this happens a lot in relationships, and causes distance between the two, and eventual stagnation). Its all about fear, fear of pain, fear of others pain, fear of loss, fear of our own inability to help.
it is strange, and sad, that we choose to live the way we do, but at the same time, the world is full of imaginary pain, and enough real pain to make us afraid of the imagined.
The more brave love that is in the world, the more safe the world will seem to be. Lets everyone try and be that catalyst!
This is really thought provoking stuff! I really like what your saying and how you say it, it makes me think and my thoughts race, in a good way.
I'm with you in these thoughts, we cant both be wrong right!? :p
lets change the world and get everyone to live that adventure together! What an intense world that would be, what a real world, and every moment would be like a lifetime of experience, it would be like living forever. I bet heaven is %100 genuine interaction.
:)
oh, also, what your talking about is one of the many ways God is so amazing! love, he sees way past your mask, you can't hide... its impossible to trick him and yet... he loves you, for you, you are perfect in what he made you to be.
ReplyDeleteLike you said on your next post, the masks we wear are just one of many shadows, and those imperfections are so unreal and completely pointless next to the truth of who you are, and the fact that you are completely perfect in God, loved by him forever.
Now THAT is a foundation.
stay cool man!